Forewords | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5

I swallowed hard, not knowing what to say. I just stared at his intense gaze but the longer I stare at his black eyes, the more I could see the depth in there. It was fathomless, like he had been drowning. With what?

I wanted to throw insults at him. I wanted to shrug off the sorrow I had read in his eyes but I couldn't. It was there, clear as crystal. This guy was suffering. I wanted to tell him he had no right to act so pained because whatever he was going through, I was sure that it was nothing compared to what the rest of us had gone through. But then again, his eyes stirred something inside of me. Something akin to empathy. And for a moment, I just wanted to remain standing in my position, waiting for him to do whatever he wanted with me.

"Uh, do you need anything?" he asked, putting the sling of his duffel bag on his shoulder.

I blinked.

"Oh um. No. I was just..."

"Uuwi ka na?" he asked, cutting me off mid-sentence.

Caught off guard, I nodded dumbly.

To my surprise, he smiled. But it wasn't the same sunny smile he used to flash at me. It didn't reach his eyes.

"Sabay na tayo," he said. It wasn't a question. It was a statement. He just declared na sabay na kaming uuwi. If the situation were any different, I would've argued with him about what he just said. But it wasn't. It was like something was telling me to remain there, remain with him.

I nodded again.

For a while, we walked in silence. I didn't really know where we were going. I was hesitant to ask him. The silence wasn't comfortable but the idea of breaking the silence was unthinkable all the same. Good thing he did it for me.

"I'm starving. Kain muna tayo," he said, looking straight ahead.

"Okay. Pero 50 pesos lang ang budget ko," I warned him without shame.

"That doesn't matter. Treat kita. No buts."

Again, I didn't know what was wrong with me because instead of arguing with him, I did the opposite. Half of me wanted to get away from this oppressive awkwardness but the other half wanted to know what it was that he was going through.

I swear it wasn't because I was concerned of his well being. He was still the same Number 29 I hated, after all. I was merely curious.

I swear.

He lead me to where his black fortuner was parked. He opened the door of the passenger side and I got in. I buckled up while he got in the driver side of the car. I mentally wondered what perfume he was using. It was hard not to notice how pleasing he smelled especially inside the confines of a car.

While we were driving through traffic, he turned on the radio. It was tuned to some love advice program. The voice of the DJ was sugary while broadcasting her love advice.

"Hindi mo malalaman kung hindi mo susubukan. Sabihin mo sa kanya kung gaano siya kahalaga sa'yo. Malay mo, naghihintay rin pala siya all this time. Since ikaw ang lalaki, ikaw dapat ang gumawa ng first step."

Napalunok ako. Ano ba 'tong pinapakinggan namin? Ang awkward!

"And here's a song para sa mga nagmamahalang urong-sulong ang takbo ng love life."

A song's intro started playing in the background.

"Pangarap lang kita by Parokya ni Edgar. Sa mga may love problems dyan, just send your concerns to DJ Kitty. 09997625520."

Number 29 drove through traffic habang tumutugtog ang kanta ng Parokya. Maganda ang kanta. In fact I had been listening to that song too, with the image of Justice swimming in my mind. But with Number 29 in the same car with me...

"Uy yung may love problems daw. Gusto mo hingi tayo ng love advice?" I asked him, playfully hitting him in the shoulder.

My own action shocked me. Gano'n na ba kami ka-close? As far as I was concerned, the answer was no. But I didn't know why the gesture came out naturally.

He shook his head, smiling his bitter smile.

"I don't need an outsider's advice to my love problem," he said.

"Then why am I here?" I asked. Frankly, a part of me thought that he brought me along because he wanted to ask me for advice.

"You're here because you're gonna join me in cheating my diet plan," he answered, smirking at me. Iniwasan niyang sagutin yung tanong ko. "And besides, patatabain kita. You're thin as a stick," he added.

I raised a brow at him.

"Excuse me. I'm already in my fattest state, thank you. Hindi ko na kailangan ng fattening diet plan mo," I shot back. Everytime na tumitingin ako sa mirror, I couldn't help but notice my fat behind.

He laughed at me. His eyes twinkling.

"I was only joking. You're not thin and you're not fat either. In fact you're sexy," he said without qualm.

I blushed red. No one ever told me that before. I didn't know whether to be offended or to be flattered. Not knowing what to say, I decided to ignore his comment. Not that I believed him. I had looked at myself enough times in a mirror to know that I was not sexy. I was too curvy for my taste. Mas gusto ko yung katawan ni Kendal Jenner, with small waist and small hips.

Bumili si Number 29 ng flame grilled cheese burgers, french fries and coke sa Burger King. But we didn't stay inside. To my surprise, he drove us to Manila Baywalk. That was the last in my expectations list.

At this time of night, medyo konti lang ang tao dito sa Baywalk. I noticed that majority of them were couples, young and old. Umupo kami sa semento, facing the waters, our feet dangling beneath us. The view was calming, with the water of the Manila bay reflecting the cloudless, moonless, starry sky.

We ate our dinner while the refreshing breeze messed with our hair.

"Bakit dito tayo pumunta?" I asked, while munching the crispy french fries.

He looked at the waters, a serene smile painted on his face.

"This is where I go when I want to relax," he answered, then he drew a sip from his Coke.

Nakakarelax nga naman talaga. What is it with bodies of water at nakakakalma sila? I hadn't taken a swim in a long time. Outings and bonding had never been in our family's list of to-dos. Not every summer. Not in any time of the year. There was always something more important to spend the money on.

Don't get me wrong. Naiintindihan ko naman si mama. Pero siguro hinahanap rin ng inner self namin ang break from the harsh reality of this world. It's just that we couldn't afford it. Yet.

"Talaga? Hindi ba rich kid ka? Weren't you supposed to go to Mt. Pulag or Sagada for soul searching? Or to Vietnam, perhaps?" I teased him. Yun ang uso ngayon sa mga millenials eh. Nakakainggit nga. But like I said, we couldn't afford to travel. Yet.

He scoffed at me. "Travelling is exhausting! How am I supposed to relax?" he asked. "Besides, it's not fun to travel alone."

I looked at him questioningly.

"What do you mean alone? Don't you have your parents? Siblings? Girlfriend?" I asked.

"Oh them? Sure," he said, this voice thick with sarcasm. "My mom and dad are always busy with our family business. They don't have time for such petty things as family outing. I have an older brother but we aren't that close. Girlfriend?" he snorted.

"What about her?" I asked. "Look. I'm not gonna pretend that I didn't see and hear your argument with her a while ago. Pero ang ganda ng girlfriend mo. And she looked genuinely worried about you. But you pushed her away," I said, wiggling my index finger at him. Number 29 rejected his girlfriend's offer. At least that was what it looked like at the time. And now siya ang masama ang loob?

He took a big bite out of his burger.

"Yes, Francine is gorgeous. No question about that. But she's also incredibly high maintenance," he expressed the words with disgust.

"Is there something wrong with that?" I asked. "I take it that she's also able to provide for herself?"

"She can and she does. But it irritates me that she complains and frets about the smallest thing. I didn't want to go to the victory party. Did she respect my decision? Hindi man lang niya inisip na hindi pa ako ready. That maybe I couldn't face the reality of my failure yet," he explained, disappointment lacing every word.

"But did you even tell her that?" I asked.

"No I didn't. I don't have to. She should already know it."

I shook my head. Para talaga siyang bata. Spoiled brat. But I wouldn't tell him that. At least, not when he was agitated and lost.

"You know what? She couldn't read minds. You need to tell her what she needs to know. You've judged her prematurely. Just because she complains a lot doesn't mean that she will do the same to things that concern you and your relationship. Love doesn't work that way," I said. I didn't know where those statements came from. I didn't even know why I told him those words, or why I wanted him to see his girlfriend in a better light.

Hindi ako love expert. Heck, I am inexperienced! Wala akong boyfriend since birth. All I knew was that, if you love someone, you wouldn't let an argument last a whole day without sorting things out. That pride wouldn't matter. That your relationship was more important than each other's mistakes.

He didn't speak for a moment. He continued gazing at the gorgeously painted night sky as the breeze continued to play with our hair.

I looked at number 29 and wondered if he was really being honest with me or if there were things he was not telling me. But then again, I was in no position to look any deeper than what he wanted me to see.

I cleared my throat to break the silence.

"So, bakit dito ka pumupunta para ma-relax ka?" I asked, trying to change the topic. Good thing he didn't resist.

"Memories. We used to spend every Sunday here when I was a kid. My parents would bring me and my brother here after we attend the afternoon mass. Then they would buy us ice cream and we would spend the whole afternoon sitting in this long strip of barrier here, gazing at the setting sun," he told me, a sad smile playing in his lips. His voice was filled with longing for that cherished past.

"And... you don't do that anymore because?" I urged him to continue.

He shrugged. He looked up at the sky and drew a deep breath. "Life happened. They became absorbed with their growing business that suddenly, as their network of business associates grew bigger, the time they spent with us grew lesser each passing year. I know that it's their dream. That they've been working on it their whole life. And that they're only doing it for our sake. But there's nothing wrong about missing the time when things were simpler. When all that mattered was making the important people around you happy."

I looked at him, mesmerized at the way his brain works. I had had no idea that he had it in him to think so deeply.

I always thought that rich kids have no right to complain about the world because they have to do everything one step ahead of us. That their struggle is nothing compared to ours. That their concerns are nothing but an immature whine. That they had seen nothing yet. But listening to Number 29 made me realize that they are also capable of feeling, of looking deeper into things. Beyond fashion. Beyond monetary value.

He turned to look at me.

"Right?" he asked, his eyes looking at me softly, as if asking for reassurance.

He looked so vulnerable. And suddenly, there was a compulsion inside of me to make him feel better. I didn't question it.

I smile at him.

"Right."